How to write a memoir, in three easy steps:
Live an interesting life. Said life may or may not include: being diagnosed with cancer, writing about the adult movie industry, marrying someone you’ve known for nine days, getting divorced, living all over the U.S. including the Deep South, experimenting with drugs, dating a celebrity, and losing your mind.
Write about your interesting life. Open a Word document. Write some words. Repeat. Revise. Reconsider. Trash it all. Write a lot suddenly. Explain what you’re writing to several people. Decide you will no longer talking about what you’re writing to anyone, even to your shrink. Take a break. Write more. And more.
Get it published. Find an agent. Revise the manuscript. Sell it to an editor. Sign a contract. Revise the manuscript. Revise the manuscript. Revise the manuscript. Revise the manuscript. Revise the manuscript. You’d say what comes next but you can’t because you haven’t gotten that far yet. But one day, you will. (You think.)
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